Dealing with online grooming
Online grooming is when someone you meet on the internet tries to make friends with you or gain your trust so they can get you to do something that isn’t safe or okay — often something sexual, private, or illegal.
At first, they might seem really kind, funny, or understanding. They might give you compliments, send gifts, or say they care about you. Over time, they could start asking for photos, videos, or try to get you to meet in person.
Grooming can happen to anyone, no matter your age, gender, or background— and it’s never your fault. The person could be someone your age, older, or even someone who seems to have power or someone you look up to, like a coach or teacher.
It can happen anywhere online: on games, social media, chat apps, or even private messages. Some people now use fake profiles, photos or even AI-made pictures and videos to pretend to be someone else, this can make them seem more trustworthy or “real”, so it’s important to stay cautious and check things with a trusted adult if something feels off.
If you think you have experienced online grooming and feel embarrassed, scared or confused, that’s normal, but remember that you haven’t done anything wrong.
We want to better understand the impact of you experiencing this issue, can you share your experience by filling in this online form? This will help us better protect future victims.
Signs someone is trying to groom you online?
Here are some signs someone might be trying to groom you online:
● They message you a lot or try to get you to talk on another app that isn’t as well moderated, like Snapchat, Signal or WhatsApp.
● They ask you to keep your conversations secret.
● They want to know if your parents or friends can see your messages.
● They start asking personal questions or sending sexual messages.
● They try to make you feel guilty, scared, or like you owe them something.
● They pressure you to send photos or videos, or even threaten you.
If something feels wrong or confusing, trust your feelings. You don’t need to handle it alone.
What to do if you are being groomed online
If you think someone online is grooming you or making you uncomfortable, here are some safe steps you can take:
1. Don’t reply or share more
If someone is making you feel uncomfortable or asking for things you don’t want to share, you don’t have to reply. Try not to send more pictures or messages. If you feel safe to, you may want to block and report them on the app.
2. Save messages if you can
If you feel safe, take screenshots or save messages — this can help adults or the police understand what happened. If it feels too scary, ask a trusted adult to help you do this.
3. Tell someone you trust
You are not alone or in trouble. Talk to a trusted adult — like a parent, carer, teacher, or police officer. You can also contact Childline (0800 1111) to chat online or on the phone.
4. Report it
You can report grooming to the police or to CEOP. CEOP helps children stay safe online and explains exactly what will happen when you make a report.
5. Keep your accounts private
Check your social media and gaming profiles. Make them private so only friends can see them, and check your friends list to make sure there’s no one that you don’t really know. Don’t share your location, school, or clubs online, and avoid posting pictures that show where you live or go to school.
Keeping your accounts and devices safe
Sometimes people who try to groom others will also try to hack you or get more information about you. You can take a few simple steps to stay safe online and protect your privacy.
1. Get good at passwords - Change your passwords on social media, games and email accounts - make each one different and consider using a password manager. 2. Turn on 2-step verification - This means that when you log in to accounts you’ll need two things. Usually this is your password and a short code that is sent to your phone. With 2-step verification, even if someone guesses your password, they can’t get into your account without that second code. You can usually find this option in the security settings of your accounts.
3. Keep your devices secure - Always install updates on your devices; they fix hidden security problems. Don’t click on links or download files from people you don’t know, and keep your devices somewhere safe, don’t let others use them without permission, and always log out or lock your screen when you’re not using it.
4. Control what others can see - It’s important to keep your personal life private online. Make your social media and gaming profiles private so only people you know can message or follow you. Go through your friends and followers and remove anyone you don’t recognise or talk to in real life.
5. Don’t give away your location - Avoid posting photos that show where you live, your school or your daily routine, even small details in the background of photos can give away clues about where you are. Try using different photos and usernames on different apps so it’s harder for someone to track you between platforms. And remember to turn off location sharing in your settings on social media, unless you really need it.
Getting help and support
If you’re a young person who’s worried about grooming or being pressured online, there are people who can help right now:
● Childline – Talk to a trained counsellor 24/7 on 0800 1111 or chat online. They’ll listen and help you decide what to do next.
● CEOP – Report anyone who’s asking for photos, trying to meet you, or making you uncomfortable online.
● The Police – If you’re in danger or someone threatens you, call 999 straight away.
If you’re an adult who’s experienced grooming, you can get help from:
● Victim Support – victimsupport.org.uk
● SurvivorsUK – survivorsuk.org
Remember
You have the right to feel safe online and offline. If someone tries to make you do something that feels wrong, it’s never your fault. There are people who care about you and will help — you don’t have to face it alone.
If you need more support, our team at The Cyber Helpline is here for you. Reach out for access to personalised guidance.
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